How to help newly adopted children adjust to their new home is always a big concern for both the children and their parents. While helping small children or infants adjust to their home may seem a little easier, helping older children and teenagers adapt to a new environment and family can seem very challenging. Yet, these older children and teenagers are just as eager for love and acceptance as any of their younger counterparts, and they’re just as eager to become part of a family.
Rules and boundaries are important for older children, and it is important to let children know what is expected of them. That said, it is also important for parents to do their homework and research, learning as much about their newly adopted child as possible. Parents should make sure to find out information like the number of foster homes in which a child has lived and the exact conditions in which the child is used to living. Support groups can also help with this time of transition.
Emotional issues like bonding and attachment take time to develop, but there are always little things a parent can do to let their child know that he or she is now part of the family. Even small gestures are helpful, like adding a teenager to a family cell phone plan while allowing the teen to customize his or her phone with a free ringtone. This lets a teen know that he or she is in the family while still being an individual.
The older children are when they’re adopted, the longer it may take for them to learn to trust or overcome attachment issues. Parental egos do not help in these situations. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, and try not to take any problems a child may have personally.
