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If you have an already existing family the process of adoption might be a bit different from a couple who has no children at all. The process of adoption when it comes to existing families needs to be a family process. If it is not there is guaranteed to be friction and the adoption might not be a success.
Many families make the mistake of not talking to their children before hand about the adoption that is going on and what will happen or why they are doing it. This causes children who are already in the family to have hard feelings about this process and sometimes to feel replace.
To avoid these feelings here are a few tips that can help you and your family adjust to the decision to adopt.
Talk it out. Don’t just tell the children that you are adopting. If they are old enough to talk to you, you can talk to them about it. Granted you don’t have to tell a 5 year old the complex details but talk to them about what they are feeling, what they are going through. This is very important.
Make it a family process. Don’t just go off and show the papers to the kids about what type of adoption that you are doing. Allow them to discuss with you what they want and what is important to them. They are just as much a part of this family as you and your significant other are. While they don’t make the choices or decisions there feelings are important.
To prevent any problems from happening over an adoption process it is important to make sure that you allow the whole family to be involved. If they are not these children can feel left out, resentful and not want to interact with the new child. As long as you keep the lines of communication open you’ll be okay with adoption as a family.
